top five things i hate right now:
1 - the groady hair in my bathtub so i cant take a bath. if leslie says she'll handle cleaning the fucking bathroom, i shouldnt have to worry about leg hair on my ass. stupid cunt.
2 - my method of dating. i have recently discovered i completely suck at this. my pinoeered method seemed so perfect, so brilliant, so novel.
i insisted from now on i would get to know them before shedding our clothes, thus negating my tendancy to run when intimate, since i will have built up trust caches in advance. i would be an adult about these things. i would not fuck strangers (anymore) or blow off those who are deserving (once i figure out who they are).
but no, this only lets me get to know amazing men who then so easily slide from safe lunch date to fabulous fallback plan while i am busy blinking. while my jury is still out, holding back put me in the "friends" camp too early. my rolex is fucking fantastic, but my bed is still empty. fucking hell, who knew trying to have a normal social life would be so ridiculously hard?
3 - how my joints always crack in the cold. and not that cathardic, tension relieving way, but that horrible old lady "oh god i need a wheelchair" way.
4 - i still dont have a visa.
5 - sometimes my job is utter bullshit and sometimes it is the most amazing thing i think i have ever done. i thought i was manic-depressive before, but it's giving me a complex.
6 - i know, i know. but if the girls upstairs insist of blasting "push it" on a sunday evening they fucking deserve to be on this list.
i feel much better. not.
and now i feel dirty for having used an outdated sarcasm catch phrase.
1 comment:
wasn't anyone going to point out my rage blinded me into thinking i had a rolex, not rolodex?
not to mention i don't think i have seen such a spinning addressbook in a decade at least.
oi.
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