richard harper

death is a funny thing.

not so much funny ha-ha, but funny change-your-life-in-the-blink-of-an-eye.

it changes nothing. it's always been there. the ultimate truth revealled.

and yet.

isn't it always a surprise? a shock. a table-turning, stomach-churning blow.

it's a beautiful, chaotic, dangerous thing. powerful, terrible and peaceful.


and it's odd really, because it hasn't even happend yet. or it has and i don't know. but it will. and soon. and i am inexplicably happy and proud. happy for him i suppose, and proud to have known someone so wonderful. and having had the chance to tell him so. saddened too, that the world will lose such a light. and sorry he won't be there to dance with steph and ang and sam the way he did with sarah. but not mournful. or melancholy. that came before. in the dark lonely night, far far from home. but it passed with the dawn and a reassuring whisper. as the darkest of times often do.

awed perhaps is now. at this shocking revelation that he is quite possibly the best man i have ever known and i didn't even know him that well. that people like that exist gives me hope. that he has lived his life so completly, inspires. and that this weekend, when i stand on the shore he sailed into 55 years ago as a young man, I'll say goodbye to the sailor, the santa, the husband, and the saint and wish him well and hope out there, there are more like him.

i hope he sees anita again.